The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
