As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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