Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
