miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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