Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
