Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
