apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
im about as happy as oj after his trial
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
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