The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
