They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
