Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
