I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize