The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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