They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
