Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
