Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Randomize
