Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize