we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize