Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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