Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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