I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.