yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.