if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
me + whiskey = a bad person
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
