Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.

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(503): View more from Oregon

She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park

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(419): View more from Ohio

cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(512): View more from Texas

I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate

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(510): View more from California

I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.

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(816): View more from Missouri

OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.

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(425): View more from Washington

VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN

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