i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
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Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
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Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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