whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
This is not my ceiling
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
