your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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