I just cut my nipple shaving
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
