I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never too late to be topless.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize