Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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