Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
You are a genius and a whore.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize