i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
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Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
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It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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