she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize