Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
