It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize