i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
