It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
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I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
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Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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