I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
