Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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