just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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