and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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