I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize