My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
