fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize