I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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