i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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