Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
