everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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