Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
