So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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