Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize