I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize