She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.