he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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